To be continued...

When we left our hero, he was busily posting away at his computer during lunch. The scene opens with our hero sitting in a dark corner at the car dealership, desperately trying to finish this post while the creative juices are still flowing. Sick aint it?

....continued from lunch.....
The aforementioned football game is a real snore. That is unless you like watching the referees throw penalty flags, or see teenage boys painted green run down the track carrying flags....

Third quarter comes and goes. The band is usually dismissed to get something to drink at these times, so all of the kids go to the concession stand, except for Arrogant Shit. Devoted to his art, he stays with his drum and reminds the rest of the section that he wants them back with 8 minutes to go on the clock. A feeling of dread begins to fill me.

At eight minutes to go, the four-count them four- drummers load up and go stand in front of the student section, to do their own, lilly white rendition of the movie DRUM LINE. It was mortifying. I did not think things could get any worse until I realized that the students werent making fun of the drum line....they didn't even realize they were there! It would be one thing to have cat calls or whatever they call it today, but to be totally ignored.... that hurts. I went to the concession stand hoping that they would serve alcohol, but none was to be had. I went to my last resort, which was to sit down and talk to AD.

As I said before, I have known AD for a long time, and he was a big guy in high school. I would guess that he weighs 400 plus now.

I saw him at the barbershop several months ago, and I kid you not, this guy had trouble fitting into the barber chair. A woman probably does not have a frame of reference for this, but that would be like having trouble fitting on to a park bench.

I noticed then, that AD had an unusual bulge under his shirt, right around the waist line. I thought perhaps he was having trouble with a kidney, or even that it might be a colostomy bag. People that size tend to have those sorts of problems. Being the discreet sort, I pretended that I didnt notice it, and didn't ask.

I got the full story during fourth quarter. AD was revisiting how he built all of the sets for the band. He told me that he built one, so large, that it had to be stored on the roof of the trailer. ( I was getting that nervous feeling again at this point). The rest of the story goes like this.....
Those of you with weak stomachs may want to tune out right about now....

AD- so I was loading the set into the top of the trailer...
and I felt something give, kind of in my side..
Me- knowingly- Pulled a muscle, eh ( I threw that in for the Canadians)
AD-no, much better- got a hernia-
Me- (long pause) so that...umm... thing on your side...thats a hernia?
AD- Yep. Kinda cool aint it?
Me- ummmm-- you realize that isnt a good thing
AD yep, just waiting to save up enough money to have the surgery to fix it
Me- that kind of thing gets worse over time
AD-well I am taking it easy, being careful
AD - I figure if I aint puking or shitting myself to death, things are ok
Me- your work doesnt have health insurance?
AD- nope
Me- Who did you say you worked for?
AD- State Farm Insurance. I am a subcontractor for their computers

Another long pause

AD- oh hey, the game is going into overtime
Me- I think its time for me to go....

The whole drumline thing is out

Troubador