Double Dog Dare

so last night I was looking for pics of people with milk coming out their noses. You remember that, when you were at lunch in grade school and and somebody whispered, "Mrs. Jones eats boogers." It happened before you knew it, milk came from your mouth and out your nose. I have a friend, who naturally is a bit older since I don't hang out with grade school kids since the court order. Anyway, it is my goal in life to make beer come out of her nose.

There are many reasons for this. First of all, the whole notion is damn funny. Secondly, it will make her sneeze at least 25 times, which is funnier yet. Third of all, she drinks Heinywimp beer for God sakes. I can't think of a better fate for that stuff. Wait. Yes I can. Pour it in the toilet and save the middle man.

So ANYWAY...ahem. I am looking for this pic, or better yet a video.

Do you know what kind of things you can find on the internet when you ask the wrong question? or ask the right question the wrong way?

I stumbled on to this site last night. It was very educational. I learned a lot. I know I know you are dying to hear what I learned.

1. Skateboards should be considered too dangerous a form of transportation for anyone to use other than trained stunt men with full padded suits on. I saw more broken bones, smashed faces and crushed testicles last night than I did through four years of watching high school football

2. All girls that go to these spring break parties are budding porn stars that can't wait to have wet tshirt parties and tongue kiss their girlfriends while a bunch of drunk guys cheer

3. I learned that trampolines cause cat fights ( translated, red neck trailer trash women). There must have been a dozen cat fight videos. Each more viscous than the last. Actually they were kind of funny because thier boyfriends were smart enough to stay out of the way. But anyway, there was always a trampoline in the background. The other funny part was that as these banshees were tearing out their hair, bloodying their faces, and kicking each other in the crotch, their toothless, illiterate old men are watching thinking that they are gonna get a peice of that ass later on. Morons.

I also learned that people can make beer come out of a whole bunch of different orifices. All I wanted was one coming out their nose. I really didnt want to see that other stuff.

There is another reason though for me wanting to find this video. I wanted to make a public service announcement to try and talk people out of the whole thing. Especially women. See, I have heard that if a woman sneezes enough times in a row, it satisfies her sex drive for the next month. If people learn about this there will be too many women reverse snorting beer, and their boyfriends are gonna want someone to take it out on, and it aint gonna be me.

But anyway, since Leesa double dog and one moose dared me to write something about her drinking problem, I will post this and hope that she will still talk to me tomorrow.

I have to admit though, there is something to be said about a beer you can call hiney.....

Peace